Meditation is the shit.

It might seem like you’re just sitting there, but you’re learning to steer your mind.

Meditation is simply the shit. It may seem like just sitting there trying not to think, but it’s really a process of centering in oneself. Of learning to better manage our mental space. Of finding our best selves.

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Image via Giphy, created by Holly Logan

And it’ll start working quickly too, even if you find that you can’t get a moment of mental silence during your sit. This is because of increasing mindfulness, meaning an awareness of what is happening in one’s mind.

If you’re a fellow flawed human, you’ve probably heard yourself say, “I’m sorry, I don’t know why I did it, it just happened!” (Not. Fun.)

Mindfulness helps get rid of that sort of banal unpleasantness by properly introducing us to our minds, thereby meeting our motivations. And when we start to see the why’s behind our did’s — they change.

And then there’s the recognizing of harmful thought patterns: seeing the negative self-talk, all the replaying shite memories, the limiting beliefs, and all the other ways we let our minds bully us.

Meditation and mindfulness help create a detachment from all that unpleasantness, which helps it to lose momentum, allowing us space to chooseto create a more nourishing mindset.

Our society seems to think we’re a mere collection of our past thoughts, that they define us — but our minds our tools, they are not who we are.

We think, therefore we are, sure sure sure.

But we can also think about thinking and change it, working to ban harmful conditioning and replace it with awesome; therefore we are also more than our minds.

Our minds are just tools.

And meditation helps empower us to use them better, to gain control — so a tool isn’t always calling the shots. (We get enough of that in politics, yes?)

It’s super easy to get started too.

Here’s a quick how-to:

  1. Get in a comfy position. You don’t need to pretzel it up, know lying down can lead to sleeping, but other than that, just be comfortable in your body.
  2. Focus on your breath. Feel the air moving through your nose, filling your lungs, and effortlessly flowing out.
  3. Don’t engage with your thoughts. As Mooji says, “Let every thought come and hug you, but you don’t hug anything.” Don’t judge it, try to not mentally react, just note it and return to your breath.
  4. Repeat, repeat, repeat! It’ll get easier with time, really it will. Eventually, you’ll start enjoying the peace of clear mind, which is addicting once you know it.
  5. Anywhere. In my cubicle days, I used to depend on bathroom stall meditations to find my center and get through the day — you can truly meditate an-y-where. Try it on a walk, focusing on the sensations in your body as it moves.
  6. Anytime. Well, you can’t meditate while having a conversation, not a decent one anyways — but you can rock the mindful 24/7, simply by keeping an eye on your mind. Keep a detached, yet discerning, perspective; giving energy to inspired thought patterns, and ignoring the others, which will get them to peter out.
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Image via Giphy, created by GiosolARTE

The Experience/Book

ill drag

How I Lost All My F-cks is more than a book. It’s a 3-part experience, lasting one month, and it’s designed to have you losing all yours:

“Basically giving too many fucks is when we give our power up to others.  When we place our value in others’ opinions. When our actions are dictated by fear of others’ reactions. When we decide that their opinions mean more than our desires.”

In Part I, I tell my fuckfull to fuckless tale, using stories to illustrate just what I mean by fucklessness, and why we need it, badly. It’ll take you through learning to care about all the wrong stuff (as so many of us do), teen shenanigans, serendipitous magic in a philosophy class, near-death meets chronic illness, adventures in jail and mental institutions, homelessness, and more.  

While you’re reading this tale, you’ll also be engaged in Parts II and III. Part II is a 30-day meditation challenge, teaching you various methods of mindfulness meditation, which I’ve been practicing for close to two decades. (And I’ll even teach it without any patchouli!) While you’re finding your meditation groove, you’ll also be rising to the challenge of 20 Fuckless Adventures; all aimed to incorporate more authenticity and vulnerability in your life, connect (safely) with others, and immerse you in a whole lot of fun. Together, it’s an average of 20 minutes a day or so, longer if you get creative with it.

The world is currently a confusing place, and this book will help you to find your place within it by teaching you to center in yourself. By the end of your fuckless experience, you’ll feel like your life has gone through a refreshing cleanse, and so has your mind – which is really your home, if you think about it. (And the lease is for the rest of your life.)

I’m currently seeking a publisher for her, so please keep checking back.

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